Melon Collie and the Infinite Sadness

Logan is crying now. I can't get him to sleep for some reason. Maybe he needs to cry and get really tired I have no clue. All I know is that I don't have it in me to hold him for hours, I can get him asleep in my arms but he's restless for other reasons. Today was another day in the dulldroms, but not as bad. As for the diet, it was baaad. I went over about 8 pts. I've used all my flex. But that's okay. I can only do my best. "But I guess my best wasn't good enough." Yesterday i cried through Oprah so I know that the fun is about to begin. During my monthly visitor i'm great though. So this too shall pass. I was happy that I have spoken to three of my best friends in the course of two days either on the phone or over the internet. Misty I'm glad you are back in the land of cyberspace. Shannon doesn't read this so it's a great time to dish the dirt...j/k. No she's halfway through her pregnancy with kiddo number 2. Sarah wrote me too. Syd is a few months younger than Logan. It suprises me to hear what all she's doing. She definitely has talking over Logan but it's kinda expected. Funny conversation we had lately about Elmo. Cause you see I live and breath Elmo cause Sesame Street is a daily routine. The guy that does the voice for Elmo was on Oprah recently and Elmo said "I bet you never thought I'd have a brother behind me huh Oprah" cause Kevin Click ? is a 45 yr old African American Man. Well later we were talking about Oprah and how she has these sayings that are soooo corny. Like the "aha moment" or finding your spirit crap. Well for all the african american pioneers Oprah always raises her finger and says "Bla Bla Bla, we speak your name." Steve and I keep saying "Elmo, we speak your name." We crack ourselves up and thats all that matters really. Have I said recently how wonderful my husband is? Well honey you are. Like every couple we have our moments. But you take such good care of us and I melt when I see you love Logan like you do. And we laugh every day about something together and that is so important to me. Plus you are one fine specimine, and I always think it, maybe not always showing it though and I'm sorry. Watched alittle bit of American Idol. I think it's Kelly's time to go. She was bad. I feel so sorry for her though. I always like Paris and Taylor but he did bad tonight, looked cute though. I wonder if Paula was on meds tonight. She is one odd and inconsistent lady I tell you that. I'm off to bed I have a new book. Jennifer Weiner recommended it on her blog. She said if I liked her I'd like this lady. And I can never read a book when Logan is near cause he wants it.